# We are Raising a Generation that Knows How to Post but not to Communicate

We're getting good at making sure people see us, however, it seems we're losing the ability to let them hear us.

In the past, communication required you to be in close proximity to another person so that you could share your experiences, observe their facial expressions, and find the nerve to express yourself. Now, communication can be as easy as tapping on a screen. Photos, captions, reactions, and even emojis can all allow us to declare ourselves to the world. We're very good at letting people know we exist, but we are becoming increasingly uncomfortable with actually engaging in significant conversations.

Welcome to the generation that knows how to post but struggles to communicate.

The rise of social media has provided us with a powerful way to make our voices heard. Social media allows us to express what we believe in, celebrate our successes, create a visual record of our lives, and connect with people who are located far from us. But underneath the benefits of using social media, there is a paradox that can cause discomfort. While the number of social media platforms we have to communicate with each other continues to increase, it appears that as we use more of these tools to communicate, our communications seem to become less planned or purposeful.

We have confused visibility with connection and engagement with understanding.

It is interesting to think about the fact that many of us can easily share a long post on social media regarding mental health, yet it is so challenging for us to tell a friend that we are struggling. Also, we may create a very elaborate caption for a friend's birthday when we do not even spend any quality time together. We also participate in some of the most intense arguments online, however, when it comes to expressing a differing opinion with someone sitting next to us respectfully, this can be extremely difficult. We have developed skills in communicating publicly, however, we have failed to develop communication skills privately.

Maybe the problem is not that we are no longer speaking, but rather that we have lost the ability to understand others when they are speaking.

The comments section has transformed into a court of law where all parties attempt to triumph in a dispute. Discussions have increasingly been viewed as contests rather than chances to comprehend various points of view. We interrupt, make assumptions, form judgments, and reply prior to allowing other individuals to complete their thoughts. Consequently, communication transforms from an exchange of concepts into a defense of personal beliefs.

The effects of lack of communication will extend past the computer screen. When there is a lack of effective communication, misunderstandings occur in all areas of life, including school, work, personal relationships and family dynamics. Young adults may have great digital skills however, they are likely to have difficulty with public speaking, resolving conflicts, expressing emotions and engaging in direct face-to-face interactions. These are not old-fashioned skills, rather these are necessary skills for being human and there is no amount of followers that can take place of those skills.

There is a developing trend toward creating a sense of self-expression in a way that allows us to present a version of ourselves that has been deliberately designed. When we tell about our successes, we hide our failures. When we describe beautiful experiences, we rarely share the conversations, sacrifices and fears which led up to these experiences. Over time, we develop digital personas which can be maintained more easily than our physical ones. We begin to feel comfortable presenting ourselves to an audience for admiration, while being open to only a small group of people.

Is social media completely to blame? No. Technology is merely a device and its worth is determined by how it's used. Social media has allowed many voices to be heard that may have been previously overlooked in mainstream media. Additionally, social media has provided opportunities for young creative types and has opened up communication channels that may have otherwise been unacknowledged. The real issues begin when technology, which was developed as a means of communicating with others, starts replacing real-life interaction.

The way we educate our youth must change. Schools need to help students develop both their digital skills and their interpersonal skills. In addition to teaching students about digital technology, schools should teach students about communication (both verbal and nonverbal), active listening, critical thinking and emotional intelligence. Parents and guardians must provide environments for young people to communicate with each other in which arguments do not escalate into battles. Additionally, young people must understand that expressing your view is not the same as communicating effectively.

The frequency at which a person posts updates to their profile, the number of likes or other types of feedback their photos receive, or even the level of self-assurance with which they present themselves through the use of technology does not determine the quality of their communication skills. Effective communication is dependent upon having patience, being empathetic toward others, being honest with yourself and others, and having the desire to get to know someone as an individual rather than as a product of their choice of words.

The most ironic aspect of our current era may be the fact that although there are more avenues than ever before for us to communicate with each other, it seems that developing real relationships has become increasingly difficult.

We don't want to see young people posting less online just because they think they should. What we want to see is a generation of young people who understand that there is much more to communication than what we post; that we can express ourselves through things other than our performances; and that we can connect with people beyond a simple notification.

The day that the internet goes down, and all of those cameras go dark and you don't have anyone to show off for, we will still have to communicate with each other.

And the question will remain: Will we know how?

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